Stuck in a rainforest

So.....Chris and I are out in Florida right now shooting the Florida Ragnar Relay race that started today.  We arrived early yesterday and decided to drive the 200 mile route to see what we had ahead for the next day.  While driving through the Ocala National Forest the GPS took us down a dirt road.  Keep in mind we had a minivan instead of our normal SUV due to a screw up with the rental car agency.  

We start driving down the road and before we know it we are plowing through very deep and very soft sand.  We had to floor it so the car wouldn't stop.  We got to a small piece of dirt without sand, stopped and tried to determine what to do.   Since the road behind us was so sandy we decided going forward would be the best bet.  With the video camera running we revved the engine and took off.....we got about 50 feet and got stuck DEEP in the sand.  

We are now in the middle of nowhere.....we tried to put things in the track to give the car some traction....nothing was working.  We waited for over an hour until a truck came down the road. Once they saw we were stuck they inexplicably decided to try and go around us instead of turning around....and they got stuck.  They got out of the truck and Chris and I looked at each other like this was going to be a scene out of the movie "Deliverance."  

Three people got out of the car...and they redefined the word, "Redneck."  There were two guys and a girl....and they were crazy.  The girl told us she was a Karate black belt and then ran into a dark forest where they told us there were Bears, Black Panthers, Minx, and other dangerous animals so she could go to a tree and then tried to start karate kicking it down....the guys called her Mouse and they called the other guy Cracker Jack....I'm not making this up.  

Cracker Jack called his drunk friend to come drag him out of the sand.  When his friend came it looked like a serial killer truck.  When his drunk friend pulled up the truck had the entire bed removed and had a large cage welded on the back....we thought we were going to be imprisoned in the cage and tortured.  The drunk guy pulled his friend out and then they offered to pull us out.  He attached the rope to the back axel of the truck and I was terrified that he was going to rip off the axel.  I put it into reverse and he dragged us out.  I paid the guy some money and then we started tearing out of the there on the road that we came in on.....

Unfortunately the drunk guy was ahead of us and for no reason stopped his truck...and we got stuck again.  Cracker Jack yelled at him asking him, "Why the **** did you stop?"  They then had to get three guys to push on the car for us to get out again.  The redneck black belt "Mouse"  told Chris, "You guys need to get out of here.  We're like family out here but you're from the city where you kill each other."  When we peeled out of there Cracker Jack yelled at the top of his lungs, "Get the **** out of here."  Chris and I couldn't do anything but laugh...it was one of the weirdest experiences of my life...but hey that's what it's like working for Jason Lanier Photography.